One Liners (not pick-up lines)

[[PX] Nebuchadnezzar]

1) My husband and I divorced over religious differences.

He thought he was God and I didn't!

2) I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

3) I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me!

4) Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

5) I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

6) Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.

7) You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

8> Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

9) Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

10) Quoting one is plagiarism; Quoting many is research.

11) I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

12) Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

13) NyQuil - The stuffy, sneezy, coughing, why-oh- why-is-the-room spinning medicine.

14) The trouble with life is there's no background music.

15) God must love stupid people; he made so many.

16) The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

17) It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.

18> I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

19) Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

20) Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

21) To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.

22) Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up


[i]apparently 8 ) without the space is a smiley:8), so rather than change them all, I just changed 8 an 18[\i]

[THE JEW (RaVeN)]

Now even easier to add a signature to your forum name, eh?

[[PX] Nebuchadnezzar]

I like to make up my own, but yeah.